Review: Used Car Classic: VW Beetle
>> Wednesday, December 31, 2008
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For reasons best left to The International Museum of Marketing Doublespeak, Volkswagen decided to begin their mission-critical US Golf refresh with a two-door. More's the pity. The fifth-gen four-door is a far more handsome beast than the coupe-- if only because the Golf's rear portals soften the enormous disparity between the front windscreen's bottom edge and the side windows' lower boundary. This bizarre asymmetry pisses on the Golf's 32-year history of two-box harmony. The resulting rear end trades brand recognition for something vaguely Japanese-- as if the Golf suddenly decided to play the Accordian. And then there's the front end's unresolved echo of Audi's unconscionable house snout... |
And the suspension. And the relative street cred, speeds involved and price. But let's leave such comparisons for the end. At this early stage in the game, suffice it to say that any VW that can play in the same ballpark as a modern Porsche is something you need to drive, if not own. So, let's take this German pocket rocket for a spin… |
Your hi-spec mass-market machine will cost less than a bare bones prestige model. Case in point: the Volkswagen Passat W8 4Motion Sport. For £34,070, you get all the goodies above (including an eight-cylinder engine) for two hundred quid more than a no-spec six-cylinder BMW 530i Sport. The VW gives you more German automobile for less of your beloved English pounds, ja? |
Approaching the Phaeton, you'd be forgiven for thinking you're about to get behind the wheel of an over-sized Passat. The Phaeton is huge: 16.5' long, and 6' wide. Despite these luxo-barge dimensions, the Phaeton is elegant, in a stealth wealth, 'I'm not a Mercedes' kind of way. Understated. But not under-equipped. The Phaeton comes equipped with all the must-have luxury car toys: sat nav, on-board computer, built-in and hands-free phones, cruise control, adjustable suspension, rain sensitive wipers, five ways to change gears (automatic, sport automatic, Tiptronic, paddle shift and wheel-mounted buttons), seats that heat, cool and massage; the lot. A Golf driver wouldn't know where to start. |
If I didn't know better, I'd bet carmakers choose model names via a Google simulation. A computer identifies search words that can be punted to page four within days of launch. In this case, it's only a matter of a week or so before lornezovenza.com and Jac Venza slip into double digit obscurity. At the same time, I suppose Toyota settled on "Venza" because it sounds vaguely Italian-- perfect for a car built in Georgetown Kentucky on a Camry platform. In truth, I don't know what it is: the word, the car, the point. All I know is after spending time in the new Toyota Venza I've become a cautious and reluctant fan. |
During his first inaugural speech, given at the height of the Great Depression, President Franklin D. Roosevelt famously said, "Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance." Once again, Americans find themselves living through days of economic infamy. Uncertain times and erratic energy costs have cured fearing suburbanites of their predilection for gargantuan SUVs. It's time for practical pragmatism; inexpensive family haulers that dine lightly on 85 octane and stay firmly bolted together for years to come. To fully understand this segment, I tested and compared a quartet of economy sedans. First up: the Toyota Camry. |
What the heck's an Innova? While the Toyota website and Wikipedia give no hint to what the word actually means, I suspect it was supposed to evoke the feeling of being innovative, exciting, something new and vogue. Well, so was the Oldsmobile Achieva. And just like the Achieva, no amount of marketing and media shots of active couples rampaging around the country side will convince me the Toyota Innova is anything more than a marketing focus group's bastard child. Then I found out that the platform and mechanical bits are donated from Toyota's legendary Hilux pickup truck. Now we might be on to something. |
After hearing all the stories, legends, and Top Gear specials on the fabled Toyota Hilux, I couldn't wait to get my hands on one. While I was in Afghanistan, I heard that a Hilux dragged itself and four American soldiers over forty miles to safety while only able to drive its front wheels when its rear drive shaft was blown off. Another ran for over 100 miles with no oil and a leaking head gasket after being shot by an AK-47 in the mountainous highlands. Talk about a letdown. Driving the Hilux sucks. |
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